angry angry.

i've been very angry recently. and i'm not sure why.

i'm angry with the world, angry with my "friends", angry with strangers who i don't even know!

what is this? grr!

sometimes it's cause they're inefficient or ineffective or stupid. or ALL THREE!

or maybe it's just cause the problem's with me.

rhordan taught before,

that when you're angry with someone or something, it's because you feel that someone or something OWES you.

so here goes. no one owes me anything.

my friends don't owe me the privilege of being understanding and accomodating.

strangers don't owe it to me to be courteous, kind and understanding.

the world doesn't owe me a good life.

GOD doesn't owe me a good life.

gerald doesn't owe it to me to be there for me all the time.

kristen doesn't owe it to me to be the best friend that doesn't rub me the wrong way.

in fact.

i owe god. for everything.

i owe kristen. sometimes maybe she feels like she's just giving and not receiving. that, i might well be guilty of.

i owe gerald. well i don't owe him anything. but he doesn't owe me anything either.

yup. there's that.

i think i shouldn't be angry after this.

i shouldn't i think.

oh well.